The dream I didn’t know I had

When I tell people I don’t like public speaking, they’re usually surprised. I get it. I talk a lot. Also, I’m a teacher. It’s my job to speak to a group all the time.

The thing is, I work with children. They are beautiful, non-judgemental, loving, tiny people. They are curious and believe everything that you tell them, because they don’t expect you to lie. They are, quite often, what adults should be.

I try to live my life the same way I teach: Expect people to listen without judgement, laugh as often as possible and be patient. It’s not always easy, because we all know that some people didn’t get the memo about being nice and all that stuff.

I’m going somewhere with this, I promise. But first, let me change the subject.

My first contact with yoga was when I was in college, 12 years ago. (Wow, I’m old.) I didn’t particularly care for it. It was ok, and that was it. Then, I started practicing about six years ago. This time, I was much more interested, but it was still a very sporadic practice. A couple of years ago is when I discovered how much I love it. I can’t imagine my life without yoga now.

If you put public speaking and yoga together you get….teaching yoga!

I have officially signed up for yoga teacher training! I never would have imagined this is where my life would take me. I’m not even sure I want to teach, all I know is that I want more yoga. I don’t just want to know how to do a pose, I want to know why to do it. The asanas are just the tip of the iceberg and I am ready to dive in with every part of myself.

I’m so excited, I don’t know how I’ll wait until July!

These are some of the pictures I posted last summer in an effort to counter all the negative “thinspo” pictures out there. I feel like they represent my feelings toward teacher training: joy, fear, excitement, determination, happiness. Also, let’s not forget to have fun!

crow

headstand

scared

yoga

Teddy bear headstand

My 30-day yoga challenge is coming to an end, and I’ve learned two very important things. More than two things, actually. But here are two of them.

1. I love yoga (I knew this, but now it’s reaffirmed. Again.)

2. I love other things too. I love running, reading, baking, my friends, my family. I haven’t had much time for any of these things for most of September.

This past week has been the most challenging. Motivation was down and grumpiness was up. Last night’s class was a perfect example of the low-energy practice that has been annoying me. On my way home, I told myself to suck it up. There were only three days left to the challenge and I had two choices: finish kicking and screaming (ok, more like whining and dragging my feet) or give it all I’ve got left.

I chose option 2. (Not finishing was never an option.)

With this new determination to just enjoy myself and make the most of it, I went to a power class with Laurie after work. I love Laurie’s classes.

When we did crow pose, she said we could bring our head down and stand in tripod. Then we could bring our legs up into a tripod headstand. My first reaction was “No way! I’ll smash my head into the floor and that will not go well with the whole fun vibe I’ve got going on here.”

I hesitated for just a second, then I went for it. It looked something like this. (The placement of my legs on my arms is a little off, but I took these pictures when I came home and I was trying to do it fast so I could shower and eat. I was starving!)

First crow.

Then teddy bear headstand. How cute is that? (The name, not my butt up in the air.)

I’m actually a little disappointed in this picture, because it looks nowhere near as awesome as it felt. During my pity-party practice last night, I had an Eeyore moment during standing splits where I thought “I’ll never do a headstand.” This pose made me realize that I’ll get there one day. I tried lifting my legs up off my arms, but they were not moving. One step at a time!