My favourite part of Fifty Shades of Grey isn’t what you think it is

Unless you’ve been living in a tree eating roots and berries because you were hiding from someone lately, you’ve heard of Fifty Shades of Grey. Chances are, you’ve read it. If not, you still know what it’s about. You know. Everyone is reading this. Even my parents! I just read all three books in four days. To be fair, I am on holidays all summer, so taking four days to read a trilogy is acceptable. Also, I did go out and talk to people. I did not become a hermit. Well, not completely.

My introduction to this series came a few months ago in a little story I like to call:

Fifty Shades of Embarrassed

I was talking to my friend Lisa about books. We were discussing The Hunger Games when she asked me if I had heard of Fifty Shades of Grey. I hadn’t. I figured it was a teen lit series, because that’s the subject we were on. A few days later, I went to a bookstore where I saw a huge display for said book. Remembering our discussion, I was curious, so I picked it up. (The book, not the display.) I opened it to a random page and started reading. Well. I was expecting a love triangle between a vampire, a tribute from district 12 and a wizard. What I got was a scene from Sex and the City. In detail. I turned Fifty Shades of Red, slammed the book shut, put it back on the shelf and looked around to see if someone had seen me. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not a prude, but it wasn’t the Bella and Edward like stuff I was expecting. You know, when they allude to what will happen once they can’t stand the sexual tension anymore, then you turn the page and wonder where all the good stuff went.

Of course, very few books are pefect. I’m actually not that picky, but there were a few things I would change here. I invite you to read the next little story called:

Fifty Shades of Annoyed

A lot of things bother me about these books. Ana Steele was a virgin. Of course she was. How very Harlequin Romance of her. I could go on and make a list here, but I think useless rants are probably bad for my karma, and I really want to do a headstand one day, so I need all the good karma I can get.

And now, what you’ve been waiting for. My favourite part:

Fifty Shades of E-mails

Yes, the books are erotic. Yes, they’re different. Yes, Christian Grey has the appeal of Ryan Reynolds, with a little Voldemort darkness thrown in there and a kinky side that surely counts for more than one of his fifty shades. But what really stood out for me were the e-mails between Christian and Ana. The whole book could have been written in the form of these e-mails, if you ask me. Kind of like an epistolary novel of modern times. Small things like subject lines and the way they would sign off made what could have been a boring I’ll-just-skim-over-this-part-quickly part of the book into a brilliant dialogue between the two otherwise not so relatable characters. Ok, maybe it’s possible to relate to Ana. Sometimes. But Christian? I don’t know. But hey, if reading about Christian’s Fifty Shades was all “This is like reading a biography of myself!”, all the more power to you.

A few months ago, while I was stopped at a red light, I saw this. I think someone found their kinky shade.

Laters, baby.

2 thoughts on “My favourite part of Fifty Shades of Grey isn’t what you think it is

  1. ssotelo says:

    Hahaha, I love this!! And that last picture…Totally know what you mean about shutting the book because you are so surprised they are actually writing what happens! Gotta Love it!

  2. Suzanne says:

    hahaha. I loved this post. Laters, baby! I loved that because it was cute, and I agree, the emails were fun to read. But you see what I meant about the actual writing kinda sucking but having to know what happens?

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